Enough Funerals For A Lifetime

6 June 1988 - 28 June 1988
Ammon, my little brother. I was so proud to have a little brother and finally be a big brother. I remember bringing my friends into mum’s room to show you off, do you remember?
We lost you to Pneumonia in 3 weeks and I wasn’t a big brother anymore.

You had a tiny little white coffin my brother.
Dad was supposed to give a speech at your funeral, but choked.

Silence.

2 June 1946 - 21 January 1993
The white flag goes up by our gate and relatives start turning up. Had to give up my room to some aunt I didn’t even know. My best friend comes by and we talk by my driveway. He is still in his St. John’s High school uniform.
He says to me, “…you’re so unlucky man”
He is not the best with words but I know he meant well. I’ve never forgotten those words though.

I’m standing by your coffin dad. I look at you but you don’t look at me. I can’t move. I guess this is the last time I’ll be seeing you. I know it hurts you leaving me like this. It hurts me too. I thought you would live forever. See your grandkids. See me become the President.

Mrs. Chibanda leads me away although I really didn’t want to leave you. I wanted to stand there forever.

To the short man who made a scene because he was drunk at Dad’s funeral. Fuck you! You were drunk out of your nut and disrespected everyone. I was embarrassed that we shared the same last name. I was angry and still am. You got sick and died two days later.
Enough is enough.

From my book,
'The Tall Black Guy In The Specs'

I’M AN IDIOT - I just made love to you before breaking up with you.

Fuck this! I’m coming to your house to break up with you today. I’m ending something that hasn’t been working for a while now…

It’s not you, it’s me…
I can’t do this anymore…
I’ve been busy that’s why I haven’t been calling…
I’m looking to pick fights with you…
You are irritating me; your voice, your stories; you!
I’m not replying your text messages…

I'm not happy and don't feel like I need to explain myself to you; I should just cut you off like we never happened.

(1 hour later)

I just made love to you before breaking up with you.

You must have known something was going on with me and thought that if we had sex, everything would be alright. I could make love to you a million times and still feel like we weren’t meant to be.
I’m an idiot, I know. I’m still a man and fight daily not to think with my dick. I better leave now before I change my mind. You know that once you start working those hips you can change any Nigga mind.

I'm gonna leave your CDs.

"Can I get my Queen Latifah CD before I go?"

"Hey, please don’t cry?"

“You know where to find me Sam; I’ll be here waiting for you”

"Peace; see you around".

From my book,
'The Tall Black Guy In The Specs'

Canadian/Venezuelan Engagement

Canadian girl Venezuelan guy's engagement from TheTallBlackGuyInTheSpecs on Vimeo.